Stay the Course

    During a week when most people are likely to overindulge and have moments of self-recrimination, I have managed to keep relatively on-track. Relatively. I made a promise to myself that I would enjoy Thanksgiving without obsessing over what was going in my face. It was good to indulge myself a little bit, though my delicate gut had other, less polite things to say about it. I do love baking, and made a number of delicious foods to add to the family feast of over abundance. And I thoroughly enjoyed the eating.
    I will say, I intentionally made it a point to hit the pool hard monday, wednesday and friday. I logged my best swim ever on wednesday; swiming 20 laps, then 20 minutes with the aquajogger belt, then 50 laps non stop and strong, for a total of 2 miles. I even felt I could have swam longer, but I swam right up to closing time and they politely kicked me out of the water. I swam again yesterday, strong and with good form. I put in a two 20 minute sessions with the aquajogger belt because I can really push my cardio up when I am "running" and "cycling". I swam 55 laps total, and the last 10 I swam hard while being very cognizant of keeping a quick tempo and good stroke technique. I want to get to the point where I can swim a solid mile, 35 laps, with long, quick strokes. My wind is getting so much better, but I am still using the pull buoy so it is arms only. I do a constant debate with myself about the use of the pull buoy, knowing I should work on my kick. But since my competitive swims will likely always be in a triathlon, I really do need to be able to swim using mostly arms, saving my legs for the rigors of the cycle and run. And, as Attila the Yoda told me during my swim lessons, when she swam distance, she rarely used her legs, just the occasional kick here and there. So I feel justified in focusing on upper body strength.
    I admit, the day after the Thanksgiving feast, I did feel like I had a food hangover. Dairy, wheat and rich foods are not friends of my poor gut. I headed to the pool still feeling full from the day before, and opted to swim without any pre-workout food other than some black coffee and a small handful of almonds. Even after, I was not my normally voracious, post-swim self. Only wanting a banana and a Clif Bar. But it seemed appropriate to let my body have a little down time from food so it could continue to process everything I had done to it the day before.
    Yes, I obsess over what I eat. Yes, I obsess over how I workout. But truly, I prefer to think of it not as "obsession" but as "dedication." Long past are the days when I could eat pretty much whatever I wanted, workout regularly but without really pushing myself, and maintain a decent level of fitness. Maybe if I decided to stop striving towards being a competitive athlete, went back to the notion of just staying fit, then I could relax my standards a bit,. But that would be tantamount to giving up, throwing in the towel, losing faith in myself. I don't know if I would ever quite forgive myself for that kind of betrayal and lack of confidence. I have worked very hard this year to reach the level I am at now, and I know there are higher levels within my grasp. If I just stay the course, keep the faith, continue on the path I have laid out before myself, then I can only imagine where I will be in another year. This last year has brought so many changes, changes that I can take almost full credit for, I am excited to see where the next years will take me.