Triathlon: The Day, Part One

    Where to begin? How can I describe the feeling of accomplishment that I felt crossing the finish line? I know few believe me when I say that I have been enamored with the idea of triathlons since seeing my first Ironman competition on TV. But for years, decades, a lifetime, I told myself that I would never be able to compete in a triathlon or any other similar race because, "I'm just not a runner." These self defeating words followed me all my life. I know I have written of them before. The reason I revisit this old song and dance is because of what such a phrase really means. By continually telling myself, "I am just not a runner," I was stating a truth, because I believed it to be so. We all, every one of us, have such self defeating things we tell ourselves. By telling ourselves such things they become our reality, because if we can't believe our own thoughts, then who can you believe. Therefore, it must be true. Yes, it is a convoluted loop of erroneous thinking, but perception becomes reality.
    Now, I say, "I am not just a runner, I am a Triathlete." I can say this honestly, and with proof behind the statement. I swam, cycled and ran, and crossed the finish line exhausted but triumphant. I had faith in myself, I believed I could do it and I did. I spoke my own truth, and it became reality.
    Race day started at 4:30am. Still dark, and too early. It was not easy to climb from my cozy bed to stumble out to face the day. It did not take long for Brain to prod me with the reminder that This Is The Big Day. My race day. My first Triathlon. Since we had packed all the gear the night before, there was little to do but feed the animals and climb into what would essentially be my Tri Suit. Wolfing down a bowl of granola with whey protein and almond milk, and with coffee in hand we headed out the door. It was an easy commute, barely an hour, and we were among the first contestants to arrive.
    Being early gave me my choice of a spot on the rack in the transition area. I selected well, and settled Joshua into his place. Coach couldn't come in to the transition area, it is contestant only, though I know he could have easily gotten an access pass through his connections, but I also know he wanted me to have the chance to prove to myself that I was capable of setting up alone. He is good about letting me do my own thing, trusting me to have learned his lessons, trusting me to trust myself.

      With Joshua resting patiently on the rack, and my minimal gear placed carefully within his footprint it was just a matter of waiting for the race to begin. Not one to waste an opportunity to teach, Coach walked me through each section. We started at the water's edge, checked the buoy placement, felt the water. Then we walked the route from the water landing up to the transition area. From there we found the bike mount and dismount area, saw how nicely placed Joshua was in relation to each. Then on to the run start, also nicely located in regards to my bike spot. As we walked and talked, my nerves settled a bit. A bit, not much. But Coach is a calming influence, he understands me, knows what I need, is encouraging without sounding patronizing. I know how lucky I am to have found him, how fortuitous to have built this friendship.

To be continued.....

Triathlon Pictures

Just a few pictures of my epic day competing in my very first Triathlon, which is actually the first race of any kind that I have ever competed in. It was a great experience, made all the better by having my dear friend and coach at my side throughout, giving me encouragement, trusting me to run my race, and taking lots of pictures of the entire day. 

And of course followed by a fun afternoon and congratulatory dinner of the normally verboten Chicken Fried Steak and Eggs with Cream Gravy. It was delicious. 

All in all it was a truly glorious weekend.

I will write up the experience later, for now I am still basking in the glow.

Training, Technique, Efficiency, Nerves

    This last weekend was a bit off as far as my workout regiment goes. I did get in a 60 minute run on friday before house guests began arriving, but saturday was all about family gatherings, festivities, hilarity, and celebration. Sunday, all guests but coach had headed home by noon, and so skills building began.
    First step, setting out all the Tri gear for the transition area and practicing the actual transitions to give me a better understanding of what I need to bring and how I need to set it all up. It was excellent practice.
    Second out of the gate was getting the new bike out and familiarizing myself with the new shifters and gearing. Coach is good at explaining new info so my brain incorporates it well; for the click shift, "remember, small goes small, big goes big." It has nothing to do with low or high gears, but the size of the sprocket. MUCH easier to remember. After a few sprints on the new bike to revel in the heady exhilaration of speed we stashed the bikes and got ready to run.
    For Coach, getting to run means discarding shoes. You just don't get much more simplistic than that. For me, with my delicate tootsies, I kick off cycling shoes and slip into the bare minimum shoes I have been running in. Yes, they are basically neoprene moccasins with a rubber sole; zero rise, no arch support, no heel, very little padding. They are just enough so that I don't feel every angle of every bit of gravel. So scantily shod, or unshod, we trotted out the door and down to a side street. There Coach had a chance to analyze my style and give me gentle critiques to hone my abilities and improve my efficiency. I bounce too much, his main criticism. I need to land a bit less on my toes and more mid-sole, and lean forward more from the ankles to let gravity do the work, lessening the energy needed for each stride. These are actually things I knew in my mind, we had discussed them earlier, but I have been unable to tell on my own if I was being completely successful. The general consensus is that I am doing very well, a bit slow though, and just need to refine my technique.
    So this week is an easy workout week for me, as I maintain my level of fitness, but allow my body some rest before the event this sunday. Rest does not come easy to me. But Coach insists, and with 300 marathons, numerous triathlons and an Iron Man under his belt, as well as countless hours of coaching professional athletes and Team In Training, I kind of figure he knows what he is talking about. I will listen to his voice of reason, heed his experience, and let myself coast into the weekend. Fortunately he will be at my side throughout the weekend to keep me from burning this nervous energy with pulse pounding workouts. I am excited. I am nervous. But I am as ready as I can be. Now to trust my body.
 

After Pics

I am not one to post pictures of myself often, but as I slim down there is an excitement to seeing the changes I have wrought on my own physical temple.

And so, just for fun, a few self portraits with my funky little camera.

The first is what I call my Super Hero Suit; 50spf compression shirt.

The second is my goofball dog Hugo, helping me with physical therapy.

Lastly, the running shoes gifted to me by Coach, I think they make me look like I have monkey feet. I'm not using them yet, but will be giving the  a solid try next week.

Funny thing, I am already 10 pounds lighter than when these pictures were snapped.

Penguin?

    I just stumbled upon a chat thread online, "Calling All Penguins." It is a board for slow runners. Suddenly I do not feel so alone in the world. I am not a fast runner, although getting faster. I am clocking about a 10:30 minute mile, which is not fast, but apparently as fast or faster than most Penguins. I tell myself that it is a decent pace for being 12 weeks out of knee surgery, and only permitted to start fast walking 5 weeks ago. So, nearly eight weeks of none of my standard cardio (ie power walk and/or running), and only four weeks of being able to run. Of course my physical therapist had made me promise to start slow and easy, and only push myself "to the pain." Having such restrictions is not easy for me, especially since I am far more used to pushing past the pain, ignoring pain, pretending it does not exist. So I must tell my inner competitor that it is not a cardinal sin to let faster runners pass me, it is not shameful, not a blight on my spirit. But, I know that I will still push myself, do my best to be my best. I may be a Penguin, but for a Penguin, I am decently fast.

Damn, I'm Excited

    Funny, it was one month ago today that I started this blog. Started my journey towards the long awaited realization of becoming a Triathlete. It seems longer. Maybe it is because it is a long cherished dream? maybe it is because I have always trained for something? So, with one month of sport specific training under my belt I am just a few days way from my very first Tri. Not even five weeks of bi-weekly swims. Barely a month of running on my non-swim days. Hell, I'm 12 weeks out from knee surgery. Yes, I am nervous about my preparedness. Yes, I want to train hard all week to smooth out as many defects as possible. Yes, I know that both nervousness and over-training are counterproductive. Coach has the utmost faith in me. And I do have faith in Body. It is Brain that is having a crisis of faith right now, but I am doing my best to quell such naysaying.
    I know in my heart that this is the stepping stone. The first true step onto this pathway, and so should be viewed as such. The first few steps are always a bit hesitant, fumbling, tentative. I cannot fault myself in that arena. I remind myself that the first few steps are the hardest, but I will hit my stride soon. I must remember to run my own race. Mine and no one else's. I cannot hold myself up to any other athlete at this point, despite my competitive nature that makes me want to be the best, fastest, fittest. I know in my heart that there will be plenty of people out there who will totally smoke me on the course, and I can't allow myself to feel in the least regretful about that. I am doing this for myself. The only competition here is to strive to be better than I was yesterday, last month, last year. In that competition I already win hands down. So, I must focus on my race, my pace, my dreams. This is my race, I will run it my way. But damn, I'm excited.

Trust My Body

    The countdown has begun. I am getting nervous/excited/freaked by the ever nearing date of my very first, and long awaited Triathlon. Five days remaining, and I wonder if I am ready? Have I trained sufficiently? Will I totally bonk? I am feeling ill-prepared despite my rigorous workout schedule and the confidence of Coach. He has complete faith in me. He is honest and upfront, reminding me that I have only been running for a month and so am likely to get passed frequently once the running leg begins, but he feels I will do great in the swim and cycling legs. I hope so. I know I can do it. I know I will be exhausted after. I have to keep reminding myself that for my first attempt my only concern is running My Race. No one else. I will set my pace, keep myself calm, relax into my game, hit my stride and run my own race. This will be difficult as my inner competitor hates to be passed. But I have to keep reminding myself that I am doing this for fun, for experience, to test the waters, and to test my mettle.
    Coach has been my Rock. Yes, he can be a stern taskmaster, but he is kind, and I know that even when he has his coach face on, he cares for me. He talks me off the ledge, patiently guides me through the steps to be a strong competitor, is honest about my shortcomings, but full of praise for my strengths. He escorted me to a Tri, allowing me to see all the stages, diminishing my fears, elevating my confidence. He takes me step by step through the race from the night before, to well after the finish line. And to my delight, I just found out that he will not be out of town working an event as was previously thought, so he will be with me to hold my hand and settle my nerves. To say I am relieved is the classic understatement. For weeks I have said, "I wish you could be there," and he agreed. Apparently the gods of athletes were listening.
    Not only has Coach been my Rock, he is also my sponsor, providing me with gear and supplies I would never be able to afford on my own. Just this past weekend he presented me with a fabulous bike acquired through his friend and business partner; A Bridgestone racing bike with awesome upgrades. I am in love with ease of the Shimano Flightdeck click shifters. And the gearing blows me away. I can accelerate downhill! The bike is a screamer! Maybe not in comparison to the insane bikes of racers, but for my needs and experience it is an epic ride. One more gift from a man with total confidence in me, and who does all he can to support me and my dreams.
    I have been told to 'take it easy" with my workouts this week, which is NOT an easy thing for me. Coach is coming over this evening, probably as much to make sure I don't spend two hours swimming laps at the pool as to just see me and spend time with me. He does know me, and makes me take down time. So, with five days remaining, I know that I am about as prepared as I can be at this point, so now I just have to trust my body. I must trust my body, it will not let me down.

And So I Will Run

    I am a runner. I have decided this. I used to say, "I'm just not a runner," and use that as a seemingly valid excuse to not run. This last winter I thought, "Why? Why am I not?" It's not like running is a complicated activity requiring expensive, bulky equipment. It is Me, my two legs, feet, body working in harmony to move myself from point A to point B in a relatively timely manner. Nothing over-complicated. True, when I was heavier it did mean moving a lot more mass, putting additional stress on my joints. But I think I have the physique of a runner; I am tall, long legged and now reasonably slender. I have powerful muscles, stamina, strength and the resolve to use my body in every way I can. So Yes, I am a runner. I may not be a fast runner, and my stamina is definitely not up to marathon level, but I feel comfortable now knowing I can run 5K without too much duress. I did not say I was a great runner, or even at this point a good runner, but I am a capable runner and am willing to put in the miles in order to be a better runner. Six months ago my goal was merely to run a 5K by the end of the summer. Now, as I am wont to do, my goal has changed to the multi-disciplined Triathlon, of which a 5K run is merely the last leg. So I will meet my earlier goal, and then some.
    Each day that I train, be it cycling, swimming or running, I feel more confident with my abilities. Yes, I have a long way to go, but then doesn't everyone? Is there any one individual in the world that has truly reached their full potential, with no room for improvement? I don't think so. Even the elite of the elite still train hard and strive to improve their skills, even if it is a mere 1%. They know that it may be that 1% that makes the difference between Gold and Silver. Me? I have a long way to go before I am anywhere near where I wish I were now. But I do have a modicum of patience. Yes, only a modicum. But I know that great changes are not made over night. Advancement and improvement take time, effort, energy, perseverance, stubbornness, audacity, self denial, mind over matter, sacrifice, tenacity, and more than a little bit of sado-masochism.
    I have stepped onto a path that is leading me onward to adventure, accomplishment, achievement, satisfaction, self improvement. This is not a path to be trod lightly, slowly or cautiously. Indeed it is a path that begs to be run. I am a Runner, and so I will Run.

Workouts in a Nutshell

    On to the strictly physical. Okay, nothing is ever strictly physical. In reality, the more physical it becomes, by nature, the more mental and spiritual it becomes as well. You cannot push Body hard without the assistance and prodding of Brain and Heart. It must be a combined effort, or you are destined to fail. I have discovered a near sado-masochistic core to my Self. I revel in that feeling of pushing Body to the point of nausea, trembling fatigue and exhaustion. I enjoy it on a visceral level, far deeper than rational mind will take me. For in reality, just how rational is it to want to push yourself beyond the "normal' bounds of physical trials? Most people would look upon such endeavors with that knowing smirk that plainly says, "yes, I admire your effort, maybe envy your feats a tiny bit, but mostly I think you are totally Fruitloops." I have seen that look all too many times, the skeptical lip twitch, the scornful eyebrow lift, the glint of suspicion in the eye. Oh yes, I have seen it, many times. Granted, not always in response to physical endeavors, often enough I see it because I really am a bit of a Lunatic, and there are definitely days when it cannot be kept hidden and I wear it like a rumpled suit.
    Enough of the ramblings of the lunacy in what we do for the sheer sake of proving a point, whether to ourselves, others, or to just throw it out into the world that, "I have picked myself up, dusted myself off again, and am going to continue working as hard as possible for a goal."
    This last week has been interesting in my workout and nutrition Universe of One. For starters, my gastrointestinal system really isn't cutting me much slack, dairy is still the recent attacker to cause my body to betray me. This has made me search for any means to get enough protein and calories into my system, especially pre and post workout. A lot of foods aren't setting too well with me so it has been trial and error, with way too many errors. Oddly, the one food that has no side effect is the venison jerky I made last year, but the supply is limited. I'm trying to not overload on carbs but am having a tough time filling the void left by dairy. The search continues.
    The highlights of my workout week include an open water swim in Hagg lake with coach, after watching a Triathlon up close and personal. I loved the swim, and it cast aside any concerns I might have about panicking in open water. Later in the day we cycled together for the first time. I admit, I was pushing myself a bit, thinking he was scrutinizing my every move. But he said I am a strong, solid cyclist and will have no problem with any cycling route that gets thrown at me. Another anxiety dropped from the list.
    Monday I focused on running, my weak link. I ran 3.25 miles (on the treadmill, don't tell Coach) with only 3 very short walking sections. I need to get my running up to par, the sooner the better, so much of my energy through the coming few weeks will be focused in that direction.
    I did have an absolutely epic swim on tuesday. I wanted to increase my nonstop laps from the 15 of last week to 20. The first few warmup laps I felt like I was floundering, so did not count them in. I managed 19, mixing up different strokes crawl, backstroke, sidestroke, kind of overthinking the whole process, trying too hard to be "just right," focusing too much on my breathing. Then suddenly, Lap 20, I hit my stride. My breathing settled in, my crawl became easy and relaxed. Everything seemed to click into place. Not wanting to quit until I established a little muscle memory I did another 15 laps nonstop, crawl only. I felt like a machine. No, I am not a speedy swimmer, but I am becoming a strong swimmer. That is what I want. I want strength now, speed later. Tonight I swim again, and I am really looking forward to moving through the cooling waters.
    Last night was my Firefighter's Physical Agility Test, a big step towards becoming a volunteer firefighter. I had gone to the previous practice sessions so I knew what was coming. I did very well, although the 125lb hose drag just about did me in and required every bit of strength and stamina I could muster to drag that sonofabitch 100 feet across the hot asphalt in heavy jacket, helmet, gloves and 30lb pack. But I did it, and am proud of myself. Afterwards, I was still so keyed up I ran for 30 minutes in the streets of Silverton, all hills (it is a hilly little town). My breathing felt good, but my pace was slower than I want, and my calves really started to burn. But again, I will be focusing the bulk of my energies into running over the next few weeks, and on into infinity.
    That is my week in a nutshell. Kind of kicking my ass, but wishing I had more time to kick even harder. I want to train more, but don't want to overtrain either. Walking the fine line. Now if I can just manage to eat without discomfort. Oh well, there is always venison jerky.

Prove To Myself, No One Else

    Once again, shirking my writing. Damn, there is just not enough time in the day/week/month. I feel like I have a countdown clock ticking in my chest as the day of my first triathlon approaches. 16 days. Not enough time. I don't feel prepared. I have been assured by my coach that I will do great, but a little voice in my head (one of many, but this one is sport specific) tells me, "it is his job to tell you that just to keep you from getting spooked." Yeah, doubts creeping in just a little. But not too bad.
    I've gotta hand it to Coach, he does know what I need, knows how to talk me down off the ledge. We went out to a Tri near the town I grew up in, just so he could show me the way it all works, and ease a lot of my anxieties. We watched swim starts, swimmers emerging and running to the transition area. Watched transitions, good and bad, and I was told the difference. We talked gear, transitions, staying calm. We talked to an enthusiastic young man who shot aerial footage of the event with a very cool remote control helicopter-ish gadget. His advice, go easy through the swim and the cycling, and save energy for the last half of the run, because by then most of the competitors have gassed out. I thought it was sound logic. Granted, my run is the leg I am most nervous about, even though it is the least complicated: one foot in front of the other. We topped off our tour with an open water swim in the lake. I had been concerned about this, knowing that swimming laps in a pool is an entirely different fish than swimming in open water with no visible bottom. Surprisingly, I abso-fucking-lutely Loved it!! It was miraculous to feel the open water around me, the temperature shifts in the water, the sun above, the cool dark below. I knew then that I will be fine in the swim, and am looking forward to proving my mettle.
    Later in the day we cycled on Kick-my-ass-and-leave-me-in-the-ditch-to-die Road, I wanted to show him my favorite ride. His observation, "You will NEVER have this tough of a road in a Tri. Never." That made me feel pretty damned good about my strength. But now I need to be working on my speed. And here is where I have to pull myself up a little and focus on strength not speed. Strength literally is my strength. I do not expect to be the fastest competitor, but I know it is within me to be a strong athlete.
    One point I have to acknowledge and remind myself of daily is that for my first Tri I am not out there to set the world ablaze with my mad skills. I am doing this to show myself that I can. To prove to myself, and no one else, that I can do this. That I can find a long dormant dream hiding within my Heart, Mind and Body and make it become a reality. Find a dream and work hard towards its realization. This is why I train, this is why I will swim, cycle and run under the July sun. No other reason. This is for me.

Work Harder, Be Stronger, Get Faster

    It is amazing how life can get so busy that I don't seem to have even a moment to sit down and get thoughts pecked out into readable script. I have worked my ass off this week, in my opinion. Yes, I could work out longer, harder, but I have to take my real life responsibilities into account when scheduling in my workouts. True, I have always managed an hour or two a day for my personal fitness so it's not like I am really adding in anything new. Just harder.
    The crux of harder workouts are the demands it makes on my body. I need more food. I need more sleep. I hit the bed exhausted at my normal 11pm and crash hard, barely able to wake with my 6am alarm. I know I should be getting to bed earlier, but there are so many things that always need doing. All the mundane chores that keep my life clicking along with reduced stress and increased beauty. I need to maintain my surroundings in order to maintain my sanity.  But damn, there are only so many hours in a day. Not for the first time am I envying the professional athlete. I would love to have a few sponsors that would pay me to train and compete. What a pipe dream! But I don't, and likely won't. So I will just keep pounding ahead, spending too much time at a job to pay the bills, getting home and jumping into a 2 hour workout, try to have some energy for my daily tasks, and hopefully some energy to tackle the overly long To-Do List of a home owner. I am wearing myself out.
    But, on the plus side: Gdamn I am working out like a beast. Adding distance and duration to every workout be it swim, bike or run. I have done a few combo workouts as well, run and cycle. I have ran 5 of the last six days, increasing distance every day. Last night I ran 3.25 miles on the treadmill (don't tell coach) with only three 30 second walking breaks, followed with some extensive stretching. Today I am extremely pleased to announce the fact that my calf muscles are not screaming at me. I have been running either barefoot or scantily shod, and this really works the calf muscles. I've been trying to head into it with some common sense and not cripple myself with my zeal, but I have had a few uncomfortable days. I think I have gotten over that particular hump now.
    So this week:
    Monday: Ran about 2 miles, then cycled for an hour on my newly acquired rollers.
    Tuesday: Had an epic swim! Swam 15 laps nonstop and decently strong. One minute break, then 10 more laps nonstop. One minute break while stretching, 5 laps, one minute break while stretching, then 5 laps at an easy pace to cool down. Total swim of 6000ft or 1828 meters. I was wiped out. Stopped at the store for a few supplies and was eating peanut butter out of the jar while standing in the checkout line. I can only imagine how I looked, wet hair, bloodshot eyes, a little shaky and eating PB with my finger. People likely thought I was tweaking.
    Wednesday: Ran 2 miles, barefoot in the grass for first half mile, then scantily shod. Followed by a 12 mile ride on moderate hills and trying to keep my rpms up. It tired me out a bit, but I want/need to start doing more dual workouts.
    So, I know I can swim, bike and run the distances I need to for a sprint, and nearly enough for Olympic length. But singularly. Can I do all three back to back? The thought makes my stomach do little flip-flops. But I still have three weeks to train, so I will keep pushing myself. I will train hard, fuel the machine, and hope that on race day the gods of battle are with me. I can do this.

I Am Eager

    This weekend I decided, seriously, that I would, without a doubt, complete a triathlon sprint this year. I have been dreaming it, testing my mettle, feeling out all the aspects. Now, this shit gets real. I just registered for a sprint in 28 days. Twenty Eight. Less than a month. Holy shit.
    But I knew it was coming. I have known I was nearly ready. My swims are strong, my cycling is getting dialed in, and I am running an easy mile. So, now I just have to push myself a little harder, practice speed as well as strength. I am not planning on setting the course afire with my prowess, I just want to break my cherry before I feel like a spinster. My first event will be to let me know where I need to improve. It will let me know how much harder I will have to train to be ready for an Olympic distance Tri. So, I have four weeks to make myself feel that my body will do me right. I want to workout harder. Push myself further. I don't know if I can be prepared enough to make myself feel at ease with my first go. But I will do everything in my power to make sure that the morning I step out into the public eye in speedo and condom-like swim cap, that I will be as ready as I can make myself in the time I have allowed. I will be fine.
    Knowing this was inevitable, today was the first day of my new and improved training schedule. I did a 20+ mile ride today, concentrating on keeping my pedal RPMs above 70rpm. I kept in higher gears and made sure my legs were moving at a good clip. Then this evening I ran an easy mile, followed with strength training and core conditioning. Tomorrow I will ride and do my leg workout.
    I feel a little flutter of butterflies in my stomach at the realization that I have taken that next step; actually spent money to register. I am committed now, no backing out. And I didn't even tell coach til after the fact. Yes, I have been told more than once that I am better at asking forgiveness than asking permission. But in my defense, coach did tell me, just a week ago, that he felt I was capable of running a tri sprint, "tomorrow, without much trouble." I want it to be hard. I don't want to skate through it easily. It is a challenge and I am rising to meet it. And it will spur me on to greater things. I am ready. I am eager.