Never Enough Time

    It would seem rational that it would be easier to motivate into an after work workout during the summer when the sun is shining. Instead, I feel like I am always in a race with the sun to see how much I can accomplish in the way of home improvements, yard work, or general outdoor chores before darkness falls. Then, I stagger into the house, at 8:30 or later, tired from work, tired from chores, and still facing the knowledge that I need to get in a workout. I tell myself I need to be getting up early so I can get in a good morning training session. But that falls by the wayside since I stay up too late every night, trying to eke out as many minutes as I can from every day. As always, never enough time in the day. Never. So, once again, here it is nearly 8:30, I feel raggedly tired, and yet am sitting here in cycling shorts, planning on getting in a spin and some legwork. I need be consistent with the rehab on the knee, and continue building strength and flexibility. Yes, I will likely be working out until 10:00 or so, as usual. So, why am I wasting time writing? Procrastination, plain and simple. I'm tired, have been on my feet all day, and it feels damned good to sit. I have rejuvenated myself a bit with some strong, black, iced tea. Time to get at it. No rest for the weary.

Hungry. Very, Hungry.

    It was a hungry day. All day. Hungry. I'm not training hard enough to justify feeling like a bottomless pit. Last year at this time, I was a bottomless pit, but I was getting in two training sessions a day, and putting in very long weekend rides. I couldn't seem to eat enough. This year, riding the wave of injuries, my training has had to be much more restrained. And it is making me crazy. Seriously. Yes, I am distracting myself with other, equally obsessive past times. My ongoing construction project is absorbing much of the time that would be spent pounding pavement, or in the saddle. Such is life. Anyway, hunger. Prevalent, overpowering hunger today. So, after a hard swim, I made a gigantic dinner. Stuffed to the gills. But, as with all things, I still maintained my "rocket fuel" approach to nutrition:
From scratch griddle cake made with organic spelt and quinoa flours, corn meal, and fresh local corn. Topped with a sprinkle of extra-sharp white cheddar, 2 over easy eggs, fresh organic spinach, and fresh guacamole. A side of just picked, still warm from the sun, home-grown Sungold tomatoes. Dessert was a drippingly ripe Maryhill peach. And finally, to push me over the edge on the gluttony scale, a bowl of Peanut Butter Puffins cereal with almond milk.
    I should not be so hungry. Maybe I need to increase my training to keep pace with my appetite. G'damn, I miss the intensity of last season's training regiment. With no race at the end of this summer I have floundered. A knee injury early on made me fall even further behind. I just keep telling myself that I am base building for an early season Ironman next year. The Anvil is in July. It will likely be hotter than a pepper sprout, but I do all right in the heat as long as I stay hydrated. Now, to bed to fall into a food induced coma. Hard swim again tomorrow.

The Urge To Race

    The urge to race is burning in my veins. I sit and stare at events, perusing the registration forms, pondering my fitness level. I haven't run a step since July 4th. I am just beginning my cycling training again, taking it slow and steady. There is a triathlon in The Dalles on September 12th that I would love to do. Olympic distance. The swim is in The Columbia River. How awesome would that be?! I want to race. I am burning to race. It is driving me a bit mad that I have no events scheduled. I want to register for the tri in The Dalles, and a duathlon in Champoeg Park at the end of September.
    I do have the Firefighter Stairclimb to look forward to this year. I had to miss it last year, it was the same weekend as the 250K. This year they are allowing districts and stations to have teams. I am hoping to entice a few of my brethren to climb as a unit this year. Last year only one guy from our district did the climb. He called me the night before, asking me to be there for moral support. I had to disappoint him, I was still in Bend, recovering from my race. So I do have one event to look forward to. But it is not quite enough.
    I think this Saturday I will try my first run. I can do a quick run after work, before my swim. Just a half mile, maybe a mile. I won't allow myself to run more than a mile. The Coach in my head knows I must take it slow and steady. But g'damn it, I want to race. I want to Swim Smart, Bike Strong, and Run Tough. It is driving me mad.

Self Coaching

    Self coaching is a two edged sword. On the one hand, your coach is very likely an asshole that gets inside your head, knows all the buttons to push, and goads you on with all the dirty tricks in the book. On the other hand, your client will often come up with ingenious excuses for skipping a workout here and there, or try to short shrift a set when they are tired and whiny.
    Okay, all kidding aside, self coaching is not easy. I don't have anyone waiting for me at the pool, so if I don't show, no one will be the wiser. I run alone, so if I decide to skip the last set of hill repeats it will be my dirty little secret. I cycle alone, so if I decide to just hit cruise control and take a relaxing ride through the countryside, no one is left waiting for me at the first pit stop. This would make it easy enough to slack off. The flip side of this is that I  will know.
    I was thinking of this last night in the pool, as I did a new, grueling endurance set. It is called a Broken Endurance Countdown. It goes like this: Warm up 5 laps; Then 150 yards each pace - - Cruise, Race Pace, Easy at the Wall Sprint between the Flags (cruise the first and last 4 yards of each length, sprint the middle 16 yards), finish with a Build to 90% for one set; Then each set is reduced by 25 yards i.e. 125 yards of each pace, 100 yards, 75 yards, 50 yards, 25 yards. Cool down 250 yards mixed strokes, 300 yards kick drills. It totals 58 laps or 2900 yards, or 1.65 miles Halfway though the first, and longest set, I was already thinking, "Oh dear gods, I am never going to be able to do this." It was tough, a real shoulder burner. But I also have the Coach voice in my head, "You're just warming up, it will start to flow once you are warm. Okay now, longest set is done, it gets easier from here." Yeah, that last part was a total lie, and I bought into it. Much like the people cheering you along on a long race course, "You're almost there, it's all downhill from here," they are always lying. Yes, I did get smoother after I was fully warmed up. I also realized that I was pushing a lot harder than the actual drill called for during the entire first set (my "Cruise" was more like Race Pace, and my Race Pace was more like the 90%). Time and time again I thought, "I can't finish this." And time and time again, I goaded myself along, "Just finish this set. You're a third of the way done, you're halfway done. You're down to the last few laps." I talk to myself, encourage myself. And, most of all, I listen to myself. The funny thing was, as I was getting towards the end, I was already thinking of ways to make the set longer, and a little tougher. Self coaching requires a certain level of sado-masochism.
    I know it is easy to become complacent with training. I do it to a degree with my strength training, relying on a fairly consistent series of sport specific sets. But I mix it up, increase weight and/or duration. I add in new exercises. I am always on the lookout for ways to tweak my routine, but not to the point that I am all over the map with it. I do know that consistency is vital. But I also know that I need to have some variation or my training will become stagnant, and I will plateau.
    For me, one of the hardest aspects of self coaching is not motivation or work ethic, it is forcing myself to rest when I need it. Currently, I'm recovering from a knee injury, and I am having to force myself not to rush back into cycling and running. I am slowly increasing my cycling, adding 5 minutes to each session, and only spinning every other day, instead of nearly every day like I want to. I am up to 45 minutes, as of today, and had to force myself off of the bike. I wanted to keep going, it all felt so good. I have been religious about the leg work I'm doing though, it is basically knee friendly strength training and toning to keep my muscles active and strong, and to help balance my hips and glutes. I'm not sure when I will be running again, but hell, I just bought myself a new pair of trail running shoes (honestly, they are shoes I have been coveting; Vivo Barefoot Neo II, clearance priced at $25, marked down from $120... how could I resist?).
    In a few weeks, if all goes well, I will go to the Eco Park for a gentle trail run. It is an easy trail, a half mile loop, well padded with wood chips, that winds through dense woods. Yes it has some short, steep hills. Very short, and I will be careful. I was going there twice a week, using it as a combo trail run/hill repeat workout. Running laps around the loop, taking it easy on my knees even before the current injury. It is a great place on hot days, since it is heavily shaded.
    I dream of running. Which seems odd, since I don't consider myself to be a rabid runner. But I dream of running through the woods, nimble and quick. Light on my feet. The dreams are so real I can smell the crushed leaves beneath my feet, and feel the dappled sunlight on my shoulders. I do dream of running, and it is so hard for the Coach inside my head to be the hardass, and keep my on track with the rehab.
    Coach says it is a time for base building. Time to reset the training schedule. Take a step back and look at the big picture. If I behave now, heal, keep strong, work on technique, continue to build my base intelligently, then maybe I will be ready for the Ironman next July. I just have to listen to my Coach.

Nothing Goes To Plan

    I can honestly say that nothing has gone according to planned this year. Starting with losing my job as of January 1st. Granted, that was a blessing in disguise, and I enjoyed being able to take a step back, look at my life, and decide what is truly important.
    But this is a fitness blog, so let's keep focused. I thought the time off would give me extra training time. And it did, to a degree. Then, in early spring I found out that the Epic 250K, my "A Race" was cancelled. Suddenly I was without a goal race. I floundered. I decided to make it The Summer to Race With My Friends, and started lining up events throughout the summer. Seemed like a good idea at the time. It would be a run heavy schedule, but fun, and with variety. A persistent, nagging cough that was exacerbated by breathing the humid, chlorine laden air at the pool kept me from logging as much time in the water as I had hoped, but my running and cycling were still on track.
    I approached running carefully and cautiously, opting for shorter, focused running versus long, pavement pounding, joint crushing runs. I ran every third day, trying to keep injury free. I kept my runs to 3-1/2 miles or so, which seemed to be the magic number to avoid IT band issues, or patella pain. I avoided pavement, sticking to trails and tracks. I flirted with Runner's Knee, but managed to keep it at arm's length. Until the Mount Hood Scramble. Other than the Freedom 5K I have been unable to run since the Scramble. My knee made me miss a 10K I was registered for, and have had several highlighted races come and go without being able to participate. I don't know if I will be able to run another race this season.
    I was cycling heavily from early on, since that is the best approach to long course triathlon. Especially for someone with running difficulties. "Swim Smart, Bike Strong, Run Tough." I was cycling nearly every day, until the Scramble. I have only just in the last few days been able to spin for 30-35 minutes without pain. Now to build up slowly, and carefully.
    With most of my normal cardio, and leg work out of the schedule for a while, it has allowed me to switch focus a bit. I am back in the pool regularly again, swimming 1-1/2 miles or so, often doing the tougher individual medley set (2 laps breast stroke, back stroke, freestyle, repeat for 1+ mile). I have increased my upper body strength training and core work so I am getting a bit of the She-Hulk definition in my shoulders and back. All with an eye to increasing my swim strength, and improving my core stability which helps improve all aspects of triathlon. I have been focusing my leg work on hip and glute strength and flexibility, both of which will help prevent future injuries (I hope), as well as increase running and cycling strength and endurance.
    So, training has taken a 180 from where I was last year. All racing events are in a holding pattern while my knee decides to stop being so angry. I will say, I'm glad I hadn't paid the entry fee for the half-Iron I want to do in September, my consolation race, since I can't do the event I really want. My weight has stayed steady, I am on track with my nutrition, even if I do eat dark chocolate almost every evening (if I didn't, I wouldn't be able to maintain my weight). I am definitely not  where I thought I would be at this point in the season, but I am in a good place because I am making it be so. And I am at a good point for base building for next year.

The Zen of Swimming

    I am struggling through the frustration and depression of being unable to cycle and run. My knee continues to give me grief, even after 5 weeks of taking it easy. I have been going through KT Tape like a teenage boy goes through a gallon of milk. I'm keeping it taped, and often adding a compression wrap. I'm careful to wear supportive shoes, and mindful of how I walk, step, and kneel. And still it reminds me of my frailties with a random, hot, stabbing pain. Not a dull ache, mind you. This is one of those pains that really lets me know that there is something wrong. Something wrong enough that it is making me be sensible, and cautious, and shit like that. Not to mention pissed off.
    At least I have really upped the intensity of my upper body, core, and dryland training. Before too long I will have the shoulders of She-Hulk, which is kinda awesome. I have been doing leg work, but it focuses on hips, glutes, and calves, while avoiding load bearing the knee. Yeah, that is not all that easy, and my quads are going to suffer from it. Sunday morning I got on the bike, to do a little easy spinning while watching NCIS. My knee told me to stop at 23 minutes. 23 MINUTES! Fuck. I'm used to going for at least an hour or two, or more, with hard gearing and sprints. So, cycling is still out for now. So it was off the bike and into the no-knee leg work.
    I was forced to take a week off from swimming while they drained and cleaned the pool. It needed it. But it meant a whole week of no swimming. Last night I was back in the water, and it felt good. But even there, my knee reminded me of the damage done. I like to do my Individual Medly workout for overall swim strength and stamina: 2 laps each breast stroke, back stroke, freestyle X 6 = 1 Mile. My knee was not happy with the scissor kick of the breast stroke, so I had to modify the set, and be very mindful of my kick. Nonetheless, it felt fantastic to get back in the water. I swam a mile and a half, and felt strong and comfortable.
    Swimming is a form of meditation for me. The steady, repetitive movement. Stroke mechanics. Controlled breathing. The need to be always mindful of what my body is doing. The only sounds are the bubbles of my own breath rumbling past my ears, and the quiet swish of my arms entering the water. Sometimes I hold my breath and swim as silently as possible. Smooth and silent. Last night, letting my brain fall into the Zen of Swimming allowed me to get past the angst of not being able to bike and run. I had the image of me becoming a distance swimmer. A distance swimmer. Why not? Why not train for longer distance while my legs are forced into standby mode? I have already swam a 5K (granted, it was at the beginning of a 250K Tri), so why not aim for longer? It gives me a training goal, which I don't have right now. Something to push for. I need that. I need solid goals to each for, even if it only ever happens on my own time, in my own way. This is the beauty of the Zen of Swimming, it helps me push past obstacles and see the path ahead.

Knee. Borked Again.

    I am beginning to come to the sad conclusion that running is never going to be my body's sport of choice. I have been plagued with injuries this year, even more so than in past years. For months I have been flirting with a case of Runner's Knee. The Mount Hood Scramble took it from mere flirtation to a full-blown relationship about 4 miles into a 6 mile trail run. I knew right away that I should stop, but what do you do when you are still 2 miles out? You just keep going. There was no option, really. On the plus side, I did place second in my age group. On the negative side, here it is, nearly 3 weeks later, and I am still relying heavily on KT Tape. I didn't even get into my crash near the end that split open my elbow.
    I know I made several critical mistakes on The Scramble: First, I didn't wear my Merrell Trail Glove shoes, since I had not done any training runs in them. Instead, I wore my worn out Saucony running shoes that are my pavement pounders. Second, I did not tape my knee beforehand, even though I knew I was close to a bummer knee. Third, I was not as careful on the descents as I should have been. Downhill, especially as steep as in this race, is much harder on the knees than the ascents. This was a brutal race: steep hills of sand, ash, and rock; boulder fields; a long slog on the soft, dry sand of the river bank that had just enough softball sized rocks in it to make it treacherous; multiple river crossings; and did I mention steep hills? Very. Steep. Hills.
    Last Saturday was the Freedom 5K. A simple run on a relatively flat course, following the parade route for the Buckaroo. Hottest g'damned race I have ever run. I figured my knee would be okay, since I had not been able to run, and could barely cycle on the 2 weeks between it and the Scramble. I had my knee taped within an inch of its life, and felt pretty decent about my chances. I knew I would take it slow and easy. My knee griped a bit the first half mile or so, then settled down just fine, but I was being so careful, and trying to run as gently as possible. And hot. It was so, so very hot. A friend, who ran a great time, had heat exhaustion that had her loopy for a few hours afterwards. Despite the knee, and the heat, I did place first in my age group, to my great surprise. My knee felt fine, until about 2 hours after the race and I had that now all too familiar burning pain under my patella. KT Tape has been my constant companion of late.
    I have another race in 8 days. I had signed up for an easy 10K. Last night I contacted the race coordinator to ask if I could be switched over to the 5K, and even that is very likely pushing my luck.
    What does this all tell me? Do I give up running, which means giving up on triathlon? Oh, hell no. I won't give up on triathlon, and especially the Ironman plan. Maybe back off on the mileage? Yes. I will go back to the drawing board, back to basics, back to building foundation strength. There are a lot of exercises I can and will incorporate into my training in order to improve my muscle balance. I can increase strength, flexibility, and muscle stamina without the knee pounding. Hopefully, anyway. I feel like I am taking a giant leap backwards in my training though. But if I can't run, at least I can try to recover. 8 days until my next race, 3 weeks until my next adventure run. If I'm careful, maybe I won't break myself.